This beautiful, blessed place of mine...

Yesterday, one of the hens gave birth to seven chicks.  It was yet another blessing for our beautiful place in Laguna Verde.  It got me thinking that our home is so full of life.  I remembered fondly the birth of Blanquita the goat, and her pure white fur, a sign for me that everything was moving in the right direction as we celebrated the roof of our house being completed.   I remembered the birth of the goslings and how they waddled in unison, their mothers hissing loudly as they protected them.  I remembered bringing our dogs, Segundo and Clara as pups in boxes to this house.  They have grown up so much since and have turned into very loyal and loving dogs.  

As I remembered the past, I cherished the present.  I listened to the sound of the rain as it hit the tin roof.  I listened to the frogs as they croaked by the side of the pool.  I looked at our garden in bloom.  The olive, walnut, avocado, artichoke, plum and quince trees in blossom.  I looked upon the flowers in the garden, and the bees buzzing as they pollunated each one.  The cycle of life was so present and unfolding before my eyes.  This is my paradise.  I feel so lucky to experience the divine beauty of this world, the rolling hills beyond the house, the snow capped Andes glistening in the distance, and the sea as she crashes against the cliffs. 

While the signs of this life are evident in our parcela in Laguna Verde, other realms are not so far away.  The hummingbirds bring us news of our dearly departed and enable us to keep our loved ones close to our heart.    It is here that I feel such an overwhelming sense of love, peace and belonging.  It is here where I hope that ones not yet born will share all of this wealth and abundance of exquisite nature which money can not buy, in this beatiful, blessed place of mine.

Where is home?

I returned ´home´ for a few weeks to help Mum out after the loss of our beloved Frank, and her hystorectomy operation.  First going to Bristol to stay with my twin Charlotte I made the most of catching up on snuggles with my nephews.  Boy had I missed them.  I thought I was going to shove my face with Cadbury´s chocolate and Walker´s crisps, but after seeing the diminished and pathetic size of a Twirl which I shoved in one go and the peppery taste of Prawn Cocktail crisps, I gave up on British food.  Well I suppose you can not call Cadbury´s British anymore after it has been bastardised by Kraft.  (No offense intended to our friends accross the pond, jut sick of corporate greed and the disappearance of a British tradition).

 But I had a strange sense of not belonging when I was back in Britain.  I had been only gone for a year but it just didn´t seem like home.  It was great to catch up with friends who made special efforts to see me, but my England just wasn´t mine anymore.  We went back to Northamptonshire, which Mum was dreading.  The grass was long and needed cutting.  There were so many letters to sort out.  Bills to transfer.  Frank´s clothes needed folding away in the wardrobe.  That was probably the hardest thing I had to do when I was there.  Mum has to slowly learn to live on her own again and we had many days of tears and sorrow.

My niece Georgia had her wedding.  I cried through almost every hymn.  Probably because I could not make it to Frank´s funeral, and it was like my personal send off for him, but also because I sensed such an overwhelming feeling of love and peace at that time as two hundred people sang the most beautiful songs.  I think it closed a chapter for me.  While I have cried since, I am more at peace in my heart with the loss of Frank.

I missed my Mauricio so much when I was in England.  This trip made me realize even more than before how much I love him.  As one chapter closed, we would be opening another, with our wedding in December and trying to start our own family.  As the plane crossed the Andes, it felt like I was truly coming home.  To the place where I felt so out of place and lost a year ago.  My emotional compass finally restored.  My heart settled in my Chile.